depreeeeeesssssiiinnggggg

I hate when I can't knit. I've been so distraught this past weekend. My son asked for Bunny Slippers last week and it should have taken me two days at the most. I finished the second bunny ear last night in a matter of minutes but it's a real bitch to knit for some strange reason. I need to knit two more ears slap on some eyes, nose and a pom pom bunny tail. I really wish I had enough motivation to do it all now.

When I'm not fully centered emotionally I can't knit. I tend to screw the best things in my life up beyond repair. Part of me wants to be alone and forget everything in the past and start fresh. I'm so not ready for it. I can say stuff a lot better than I can act on them. I woke up with a terrible feeling today and I still can't shake it. The only thing I can do is push the one who loves and cares for me away. It's not fair. 

What am I to do on this rainy day? I'm glad the sun is out in spite of all the gray clouds and rain. It's as if the world feels as I do. Happy and bright knowing I'm still in love yet dreary and soppy because everything still hurts. I want to talk about my felty slippers but I have yet to finish those also.


I'm ready to start sewing again. I promised two of my friends I'd teach them how to sew and so I need to get the hang of things. To take my mind off things I'm going to sew together Jewelry Mannequins. Since I don't have money to go out and buy everything I'm going to try and make do with what I have at home. I reeeeaaally shouldn't be starting another project till I finish my others but oh well. OH! and I keep forgetting to post pictures of my Beatnik Sweater. geez I'm the biggest slacker of all time. I feel nauseous again. I better lay down for a minute. I'm sorry this post is uber depressing and lame. pk